Sometimes when I say "Ohh, I'm fine," I want you to look me in the eyes and say "Tell the truth." I want you to realize that without you, I'll simply never be fine. You were the reason for my happiness. For living. For smiling. When I saw you, I saw 'the world.' I saw a future. I saw someone like no other. Obviously I couldn't be any wronger. You were like the rest. Hopeless. You build me up and watched as I slowly shattered into a million little pieces. And just left me there; broken. I still can't believe that YOU did this to me. After I gave you my heart, you threw it in my face.
Why can't life go back to how it was when I was younger ? When I could trust anyone. When my biggest secret was that I had gotten my period. That the only guy I loved was my daddy. That the only times I cried was when I scrapped my knee. That the only enemies I had were those who stole my pencils. When I didn't have to worry what anyone said about me or actually, no one said anything about anyone behind there backs. Those were the days. The simple days. Now everything changed. I can't trust anyone. My biggest secret is that I lost my virginity to my BEST friend; and I'm in love with him, clueless of how he feels. I cry myself to sleep every night. I've made enemies because of lies of others, and even have enemies I've never even met. And all people do now is talk about you behind your back. These are the new days. The days that make me feel like there has to be something better than this. Than feeling like crap everyday. There is never a day I can't just have a real smile. I have to draw this big fake smile on my face to show that my life is perfect, when it really is a mistake and disaster after another. I have a ounce of faith left that someday I won't have to draw the smile, it'll appear by it's self. And that the day when I stop caring what people think. When I find out what he really thinks about me. I don't let people steal my joy, and let things happen.